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If ever there were a time to stop beating yourself up for being human, it is now. As discussed, one benefit of online dating sites is access to hundreds, even thousands of potential mates—but having all those options is not always a great thing. Personality and Individual Differences, 46, Rosenfeld, M. Searching for a mate: The rise of the Internet as a social intermediary.

Hitsch, G. Kniffin, K. The effect of nonphysical traits on the perception of physical attractiveness: Three naturalistic studies. There's pressure for things to turn romantic quickly.

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But this can also lead you to pass up on potential dates because with all those options, you can't help but think, "There must be someone better out there. Too many options can be a bad thing. It can be good for shy people. Access to more people and more types of people.

Unlike other social venues, on an online dating site, you can be fairly certain that everyone you meet is single and looking. Gwendolyn Seidman, Ph. Follow her on Twitter.

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Clinical Psychology Review, 24 7— Amichai-Hamburger, Y. Cacioppo, J. Marital satisfaction and break-ups differ across on-line and off-line meeting venues. A recent survey of 19, people who married between and found that 35 percent of these new couples met online, with about half of those meeting through an online dating site Cacioppo et al. You can break free from traditional gender roles. One benefit of online dating is that you know those on the site are single and looking, which reduces ambiguity.

Online dating sites can thus foster an attitude in which potential mates are objectified like products on a store shelf, rather than people Finkel et al.

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But this also creates pressure quickly to turn your online connection into something romantic, rather than letting romantic feelings develop more slowly. In addition adult searching online dating phoenix the sheer of people you can meet, many sites provide an avenue for meeting like-minded people. American Sociological Review, 77 4— Scharlott, B. Overcoming relationship-initiation barriers: The impact of a computer-dating system on sex role, shyness, and appearance inhibitions.

This is only exacerbated by the emphasis on physical attractiveness created by online dating profiles. Posted Jul 08, Reviewed by Ekua Hagan. A preliminary investigation. It is well documented that physical attractiveness is a major factor in romantic attractionespecially initial attraction Sprecher, Not surprisingly, physically attractive people are more successful at online dating Hitsch et al.

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Less is more: When and why familiarity breeds contempt. You know where people stand.

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Sprecher, S. The importance to males and females of physical attractiveness, earning potential, and expressiveness in initial attraction. One study of online daters found that most viewed each other as adult searching online dating phoenix similar, and liked each other less, afterward, compared to before their offline dates Norton et al. This removes a lot of the ambiguity that you face when you meet an interesting person at a work event or a party. The sites can put too much focus on physical attractiveness.

Alden, L. Interpersonal processes in social phobia. Computers in Human Behavior, 11 2— Schwartz, B. The paradox of choice: Why more is less. Evolution and Human Behavior, 25 288— Norton, M. Less is more: Why online dating is so disappointing and how virtual dates can help.

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In the quest to find romance, more of us have turned to online dating. Romantic relationships often do develop slowly, rather than taking off from instant mutual attraction. For more on misconceptions about online dating, read my post on 4 Myths about Online Dating. Sex Roles, 21 Ward, C. Relation of shyness with aspects of online relationship involvement.

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Close Encounters. Research shows that people spend their time on dating sites searching criteria such as income and educationand physical attributes like height and body type, when what they really need is information about the actual experience of interacting with and getting to know the person on the other end of the profile Frost et al.

Behavior Therapy, 33adult searching online dating phoenix Finkel, E. Psychological Science in the Public Interest, 13 Frost, J. Journal of Interactive Marketing, 2251— Green, A. Breaking down the barriers of social anxiety: Online group presentation. Online profiles are missing vital information you can only glean in person Finkel et al. These individuals may have an easier time approaching people and opening up online. Because of the ease and relative anonymity of online dating sites, we may take more risk by reaching out to adult searching online dating phoenix we would not approach in person.

There are dating sites devoted to particular religious groups, like Christian Mingle or JDate, for example, as well as sites that cater to gay and lesbian daters. In my own analysis of this data, I examined the age at which survey respondents met their current partner and compared this to the age at which they became romantically involved, to get a rough sense of how long it took couples to go from first meeting to a romantic relationship. Back Find a Therapist. The same principle applies to online dating: The sheer of potential partners creates abundant choice.

New York: HarperCollins Publishers. The most obvious benefit of these websites is that they provide easy access to thousands of potential dates. So you're not a "10" in every which way. Back Get Help. It could become a crutch.

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Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 21 Back Psychology Today. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 25— Davila, J. Is social anxiety associated with impairment in close relationships? I found that those who met their partners via online dating sites became romantically involved ificantly sooner an average of two-and-a-half months than those who met in other ways an average of one-and-a-half years.

But you're probably pretty spectacular in some way, and definitely good enough in most areas of life. Research suggests that those who are socially anxious Green, or introverted Amichai-Hamburger et al.

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Profiles provide limited information. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 9297— Rice, L. The role of extraversion and neuroticism in influencing anxiety following computer-mediated interactions. Verified by Psychology Today. Once stigmatized as a venue for the desperate, online dating has become a normal part of the mating game. As mentioned earlier, those who are introverted or shy may find online dating more palatable than other ways of looking for love.

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